Howdy Ya’ll! It’s your favorite Cowboy Connor and we just got back from another Mucking awesome week end in our favorite city to sin in. I’m taking bout Vegas baby! You know i got my noodle wet!
So in the span of 3 days we played 4 tourneys (3 final table appearances) and earned almost a grand in Cash! Cha Ching! So here’s a quick break down for the economic gambler. Cause hey, we got to show the small tourneys some LOVE!
Planet Hollywood Casino
Time: Friday, 7:00 PM
Buy In: $70.00 + $10.00 add-on.
Starting Chip Stack: 4,000 with add on.
Blind Periods: 20 min, start at 25/50.
Dealers: Nice to look at (if you like exotic things) but not the best to converse with if ya know what i mean!
Re-entries: For the first hour of play.
Players: Around 30.
Tourney Notes: A mid twenties to early thirties crowed with multiple fine-ass hoochie mamas that let their goodies flop all over the place. I swear I saw a nipple. Skill level varied with a few sharks but hey that nipple flaunting chick made final table so it aint a bad tourney for the average player.
Poker Room: In the heart of the casino with a very lively environment surrounding it. Flashing pink neon lights + foreign dealers + scantily clad chicks make you sort of feel like you’re in some sort of Japanese anime.
MGM Grand
Time: 11:00 AM
Buy In: $65.00
Starting Chip Stack: 2,000.
Blind Periods: 20 Min, starts at 25/50.
Dealers: Sarcastic as muck but easy on the eyes. All though since most be of the female species they tend to talk a lot of shit!
Re-entries: For the first hour of play.
Players: Around 100.
Tourney Notes: A wide variety of players from young to old with a wide range of skill levels. Not too many smoking hot babes though, a couple of “butch-looking” ladies with mad skills taking men out left and right. Not me though, of course…
Poker Room: Dis room be state of the art with mad LCD’s all over the place projecting stats and other random shiat! Tables are, well tables. Felt is soft and might be nice to take a nap on but other than that nothing more to report.
Mandalay Bay
Time: Sunday 11:00 AM
Buy In: $50.00
Starting Chip Stack: 2,000.
Blind Periods: 15 Min, starts at 25/50.
Dealers: These dealers aint mucking around. They call it like they see it and are more than happy to tell you “FOR THE LOVE OF GOD FOLD POCKET ACES!”
Re-entries: For the first 1/2 hour of play.
Players: Around 30.
Tourney Notes: A bit disappointed with the cocktail waitresses. They weren’t the grade A quality, step on the scene hearing hoochie screaming, slots (i mean sluts) I have come to expect from these top of the line casinos. But hey, its 11 AM. I am sure all of the fine ass ones passed out a couple hours before. So try the later tourneys if your looking for that fine thang to “Get your noodle wet!” as she serves you your drink. I swear I‘ve scene a cracked out Misha Barton look alike (or maybe the real thing considering the context) in this poker room before. As far as skill goes there are a lot of fish but a few sharks here and their. Just be patient and aware of who your betting against.
Poker Room: Let down! No mucking monitor with stats. The room is freaking tiny as mini-me after u cut off his legs and make him an amputee. And this room is cold like the end scene of Titanic where Leo is in the water and cant talk right cause he’s got that hypothermia crap. Bottom line: Bring a mucking coat!
Hard Rock Casino
Time: Sunday, 1:00 PM
Buy In: $45.00 + $5.00 add-on (the add-on is a dealers bonus so mucking pay it you bastards!)
Starting Chip Stack: 5,000 with add-on.
Blind Periods: 20 Min, starts at 25/50.
Dealers: Friendly dealers. Call you by your first name and very willing to call you out on your sh#T. If your a drunk wino, they’ll probably make you know it be true!
Re-entries: For the first hour of play.
Players: Around 30.
Tourney Notes: Some what a bro/ bra kind of crowed who encourage each other to constantly go all in but over all it makes a fun table. A mix of talent and novices. A lot of locals play so beware. Not necessarily the best small tourney for the novice playa!
Poker Room: Small but muckin baller! Customized felt with rock legends on the table and in an environment that screams “I’m a bad ass muckin poker player!”
This is Cowboy Connor saying Adios!
-Connor
Get in with the mucksters